BECOSS

INTERVIEWER: The four of you aside, and we've mentioned Mark Ruffalo, but also Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman? That's a hell of a cast, dude!

Tue, 21 May 2013 01:51:00 -0400

INTERVIEWER: The four of you aside, and we've mentioned Mark Ruffalo, but also Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman? That's a hell of a cast, dude!
JESSE EISENBERG: Yeah, it was incredible. I was the first actor signed on, so every few weeks they would call me and tell me, 'this guy's in it, that guy's in it...' I was so happy because I got to perform with them.
INTERVIEWER: Did you take credit, though? Like, 'Oh, of course! Once I signed on, you knew that everybody was going to fall in line!'
JESSE EISENBERG: I think that was the only thing detracting from them doing it immediately.

INTERVIEWER 1: Did it [working on Now You See Me] end up spoiling some of the child innocence about magic for you, though?

Tue, 21 May 2013 01:34:00 -0400

INTERVIEWER 1: Did it [working on Now You See Me] end up spoiling some of the child innocence about magic for you, though?
JESSE EISENBERG: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I became pretty jaded during this movie. I also thought that all movies were real and I found out that they're actually filmed by actors.
INTERVIEWER 2: [laughing] Okay, Jesse, there's no reason to be a jackass, please.
JESSE EISENBERG: Sorry!

INTERVIEWER: Didn't I see somewhere that you feel horribly guilty doing that [performing magic] to people?

Tue, 21 May 2013 01:23:00 -0400

INTERVIEWER: Didn't I see somewhere that you feel horribly guilty doing that [performing magic] to people?
JESSE EISENBERG: Yeah! Yeah, I guess so. I was doing magic on the set [of Now You See Me] with my magic teacher, and we would do a trick to somebody, he would walk away to get a donut, and I would apologize to the person we just did the trick on. I don't like keeping secrets; I'm a terrible friend--I can't keep secrets.

Photo

Thu, 16 May 2013 00:42:26 -0400

Interviewer: You’re in New Orleans for this junket, you filmed...

Thu, 16 May 2013 00:11:28 -0400

Interviewer: You’re in New Orleans for this junket, you filmed some of the movie here, and you’re currently working on Rio 2, which is in Rio de Janeiro. Those are two big party cities. Has any of that rubbed off on you? (x)

(x)

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 23:12:12 -0400

(x)

What got you thinking about this whole idea for a play? Were...

Thu, 18 Apr 2013 15:53:04 -0400

What got you thinking about this whole idea for a play? Were you interested in this period of history—do you have any relatives yourself who survived the Holocaust? (x)

I Didn't Win Any Pulitzer Prizes This Year

Wed, 17 Apr 2013 21:41:18 -0400

I Didn't Win Any Pulitzer Prizes This Year:

by Jesse Eisenberg

I was awarded zero Pulitzer Prizes this year. This egregious omission follows last year’s receipt of no Pulitzer Prizes, and continues my twenty-nine-year streak of not receiving even one of these prizes.

The Pulitzer Prize was created in 1917, and is awarded in twenty-one categories, none of them to me.

Overlooked in the nonfiction category was an e-mail dated January 17th, with the subject line “Re: (No Subject),” and which contained the message, “I can’t do 7:30 and Babbo is insane on Fridays. Call Carl, he knows a waiter.” This e-mail, which received no Pulitzer Prize, was sent by me, J.Eisen1983@gmail.com, to the e-mail address PeterBway@aol.com. Nicholas Lemann, of the Pulitzer committee, did not comment, “The e-mail exchange between Mr. Eisenberg and Peter Bway was informative, but its brevity is what pushed it over the edge. I hope this honor encourages Mr. Eisenberg to continue to write e-mails, either from his Gmail account or a work account yet to be created.”

The second award I lost was in the political-cartoon category. As I am apparently not known for my clever doodles on diner menus, my recent caricature, titled “Nancy Pierogi,” drawn on the corner of a Ukrainian diner menu, whimsically skewered the former Speaker for her failure to regulate the banks and also lost me a Pulitzer Prize.

In the journalism category, I did not win a Pulitzer Prize for a Sudoku puzzle I completed in the back of last Friday’s AM New York newspaper. The losing puzzle was finished on a 3 express train between Seventy-second and Forty-second Streets, an ambitious timeframe to complete such a puzzle, but one the committee presumably felt was doable.

Nor did I win a Pulitzer Prize for my intrepid reporting on the state of my piano and whether it should be placed near a window even though it might blanch the wood finish. My mother blocked my calls saying, “I just can’t keep talking about this everyday, Jesse,” but I persisted, calling from a pay phone in the middle of the night when I knew she would answer. Relentless coverage of this issue was completed in March (and the piano was moved away from the window), yet no Pulitzer Prize was granted.

The Pulitzer Prize Board also avoided awarding me anything in the category of musical composition. The committee did not issue a prize in this category last year either, and it kind of makes me feel like it’s all about who you know. And not for nothing, but I listened to the 2009 Pulitzer winner Steve Reich’s “Double Sextet” and it’s just repetitive and obvious.

In the drama category, the fit I threw in Best Buy over a dysfunctional pair of Beats By Dre headphones not only went unnoticed by the Pulitzer committee but also got me banned from the Union Square Best Buy location, which is annoying because it’s open twenty-four hours and right near my house.

Finally, I won no Pulitzer Prizes for my photography (iPhone picture of “Unknowing Girl on Subway”) or my public service (“Giving Up Seat to Elderly Woman to Look Good for Unknowing Girl on Subway”).

Says the Pulitzer-free Eisenberg of this year’s prizes: “It’s thrilling just to be considered by the Pulitzer committee. But to be ignored year after year is truly an honor I never thought I would receive.”

Interviewer (after Jesse mentioned his upcoming musical): Can...

Wed, 17 Apr 2013 19:49:03 -0400

Interviewer (after Jesse mentioned his upcoming musical): Can you dance as well? (x)

Oscar Nominee Luncheon 2011 (x)

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 02:35:00 -0400

Oscar Nominee Luncheon 2011 (x)

Masterpost of Jesse Eisenberg's writing

Sat, 16 Mar 2013 22:39:15 -0400

mrjesseeisenberg:

just thought I would go ahead and do this because Anna was asking about a masterpost for things Jesse’s written

McSweeney’s articles—here is a link to all of them, and listed individually:

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Matthew’s House

Body Rituals Among the Lauxesortem

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Thanksgiving With Vegans

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Organix vs. the San Gennaro Street Festival

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Robert Frost Elementary School Cafeteria

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: TCBY

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: The Whiskey Blue Bar at the W Hotel

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Masgouf

Bream Gives Me Hiccups: Restaurant Reviews from a Privileged Nine-Year-Old: Sushi Nozawa

Jeremy Lin Has Helped Me Through Some Pretty Tough Times

A Post Gender Normative Man Tries to Pick Up a Woman at a Bar (and here is a recording of Jesse reading this)

Marxist-Socialists Jokes

Manageable Tongue Twisters

The New Yorker: Marv Albert Is My Therapist

Bullett: Jesse Eisenberg on His Lifelong Aversion to Youth Culture

Men’s Health: Jesse Eisenberg on Fear

BlackBook Magazine: Actor & Playwright Jesse Eisenberg on the Thrill of the Stage

Being asked to record a video for his Chinese fans. [x]

Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:29:14 -0500

Being asked to record a video for his Chinese fans. [x]

The Revisionist talkback, part 2

Tue, 26 Feb 2013 19:18:08 -0500

The Revisionist talkback, part 2

INTERVIEWER: I was going to say that you could get an honorary Bar Mitzvah--you've served your time; you've done so many Jewish themed pieces.

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 00:17:46 -0500

INTERVIEWER: I was going to say that you could get an honorary Bar Mitzvah--you've served your time; you've done so many Jewish themed pieces.
JESSE EISENBERG: Right. Yeah, it's like, I haven't graduated from college yet but I'm hoping for an honorary degree to have it before, which is kind of inconceivable.
INTERVIEWER: Well, neither did Mark Zuckerberg. So you're in extremely good company.
JESSE EISENBERG: He has a little something more to show for it.

JESSE EISENBERG: What happened was, I have a very close relationship with my aunt, she's a hundred and one, she was born this little town in south eastern Poland. And I told her if I got into a movie in Europe, that I would go visit this house that she grew up in. So I got into a movie that was filming in Bosnia and I didn't know so much about geography so I thought, you know, I could have an after work excursion to Szczecin. But I promised her I would go to this little town, I would see the house she grew up in--she'd always tell me about it. So I was doing this movie and after the movie ended, I flew out... Let me skip to another part of the story, because it's a funnier part of it. When I took all these pictures of the house and I brought them back to my aunt and she looked at them for a second and said, 'Oh, yeah that's it.' And uh, she couldn't care less. Two weeks, rented a car, got into a car accident--

Fri, 22 Feb 2013 20:00:27 -0500

JESSE EISENBERG: What happened was, I have a very close relationship with my aunt, she's a hundred and one, she was born this little town in south eastern Poland. And I told her if I got into a movie in Europe, that I would go visit this house that she grew up in. So I got into a movie that was filming in Bosnia and I didn't know so much about geography so I thought, you know, I could have an after work excursion to Szczecin. But I promised her I would go to this little town, I would see the house she grew up in--she'd always tell me about it. So I was doing this movie and after the movie ended, I flew out... Let me skip to another part of the story, because it's a funnier part of it. When I took all these pictures of the house and I brought them back to my aunt and she looked at them for a second and said, 'Oh, yeah that's it.' And uh, she couldn't care less. Two weeks, rented a car, got into a car accident--
INTERVIEWER: Is that true? You got into a car accident?
JESSE EISENBERG: I had a car accident, the guy--ah well, it's not important. Um, I was a victim! Anyway...

"It’s going swimmingly. Which is interesting—or ironic—because I can’t swim."

Tue, 02 Oct 2012 17:56:25 -0400

“It’s going swimmingly. Which is interesting—or ironic—because I can’t swim.”

- Jesse Eisenberg on his new play, “The Revisionist”

spiritofedens: Jesse backstage on The Tonight Show (Jan. 6,...

Tue, 04 Sep 2012 05:02:00 -0400

spiritofedens:

Jesse backstage on The Tonight Show (Jan. 6, 2011) [x]

annepunchmeintheface: Jesse presents an award at the Gotham...

Tue, 04 Sep 2012 02:35:34 -0400

annepunchmeintheface:

Jesse presents an award at the Gotham Independent Film Awards, November 29, 2010.

Interviewer: “Is it nerve-wracking to present an award show?” (x)

Jesse discusses his character in "Why Stop Now"

Thu, 23 Aug 2012 00:48:12 -0400

Collider: Could you identify with the aspect of this character having a talent and passion, but not quite having the belief that he could live his dream?
JESSE: Yeah, exactly. That’s what’s driving him. He has this great ability and, at the same time, this great feeling of worthlessness that comes from having a troubled situation and the guilt that accompanies being great at something, in a situation that doesn’t always encourage you to be comfortable with that. That’s a sad rut to be stuck in, but is a really great story because it really centers on this guy figuring out that he’s good at this thing, and that’s okay. All these terrible personal circumstances can be separate. I see that all the time. Working in the arts, you see people who come from terrible circumstances and who, for whatever reason, have this incredible talent. But of course, with that great talent comes some guilt because, if you come from circumstances that don’t encourage it, it can be really confusing.
Collider: What were the biggest challenges in playing someone who is trying to be disciplined while living in such a chaotic lifestyle?
JESSE: He is that kind of a kid who had to grow up too quickly because his mom is not responsible, even though she’s a loving mother. He’s had to be her parent, in a way, and engineer her life while he’s trying to pursue his own goals and dreams. That’s just too much of a burden for a person. The story takes place mostly in a day, and it’s just this awful day where he’s both trying to do the greatest thing in his life, and dealing with the worst thing in his life. But, he has a good and constructive attitude, so the movie ends up being funny and sarcastic because he’s able to have this flustered reaction to all of it.

Collider: What attracted you to Now You See Me, and what was it like to work with Louis Leterrier?

Thu, 23 Aug 2012 00:17:38 -0400

Collider: What attracted you to Now You See Me, and what was it like to work with Louis Leterrier?
JESSE: It’s a really unique movie. The cast was huge and, for each character, they cast these incredible actors. It was a surreal experience. Every day, there was somebody really interesting coming in. It was a really fun time. I played the world’s greatest mind magician. He’s able to manipulate people through these very elaborate tricks. It was such a creative experience because the filmmakers created these very elaborate tricks that were interwoven into this complicated plot where the FBI is trying to figure out how they’re doing it. So, on the one hand, you’re seeing these incredible things, as an audience, in the same way that an audience would be watching these magicians. And then, on the other hand, you’re trying to figure it out from the perspective of the FBI. It was a really interesting process.