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A gratuitous tumblog dedicated to the awfully witty, intelligent, and troll-like things that come out of Jesse Eisenberg's beautiful mouth.

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13 Jun 2012 AT 12:28PM

RUBEN: There it is, ladies. Get it.

JESSE: I look like my ancestors, who uh… who were victims in World War II.

RUBEN: No! Come on.

JESSE: The one thing we share is girth.

PAUL: That shot’s gonna be on Mr. Skin in about three years.

JESSE: And I’ll probably be masturbating to it. Just by, by accident.

(via liesl-liselotte-deactivated2012)

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